How Well Would Your Other Half Do?

Having watched the TV programme "Don't Tell The Bride" last night there were a few things that made me wonder how well my own hubby of 19 years would have done if he had been told he had to organise our wedding all on his lonesome!

There were a few points that struck me during last night's programme. A very sweet young Essex couple,Luke and Lauren, decided to hand over their big day to the BBC by signing a legal document stating that the Groom2Be, Luke would be the only one to be involved in the planning of their big day, in return for £12,000 to pay for it!

Young Lauren scooped up her baby, Poppy and her best mate and hot footed it off to Italy to visualise the Italian style wedding she had always dreamt of. This wedding which would have taken place in an Italian Catholic Church, followed by a small and intimate reception in an authentic Italian restaurant with her dressed in a simple fitted and very plain wedding dress.

Meanwhile Luke was desperately trying to get permission to marry in the local Catholic church that Lauren attended regularly but was having to line up plan B which was to have a Civil Ceremony in a very English stately home hotel!!

My heart was in my mouth as the camera cut back to Lauren who was getting very emotional in the Italian Chapel, describing how her faith is what got her through her baby's early days of lying in an incubator on a Special Care Baby Unit having been born 5 weeks prematurely! The thought of this poor (very teary) girl coming home only to find out she was to be wed in a civil ceremony was almost too much to bear!

Luke then went on to choose her wedding dress - a dress that was - well everything she said she hated in a dress! All except for the fitted bit anyway!

Her Hen Night was to be held in the centre of London (she was a Southend Girl), and she and her hens were to be dressed in skimpy shorts, leotards, leg warmers etc (think Eric Prinz). Of course this left her feeling very vulnerable and uncomfortable and so she and her hens hopped straight back onto their fun bus and set off back to Southend to finish off their night on familiar territory!

So, what started out as a young bride who's expectations were way off target, a young Groom who didn't seem to know what was really important to his wife turned out to be a very successful wedding with Lauren getting the all important Catholic wedding and she even loved the wedding dress he picked out for her!

Phew!

The Role of the Groom

In the age of the modern man, we are seeing more and more Grooms to be that actually want to be involved with the wedding planning. This is sometimes a welcome relief for the Bride to be as traditionally the finer detail has been left to the her. Nice as this sometimes unexpected involvement is however, we know that sometimes us women actually prefer to take on the entire wedding planning on our own. And yes we do sometimes also like to moan about the lack of involvement on the part of the Groom to be, even if he has actually offered to help and we have refused! So what exactly does the traditional role of the groom entail?

Firstly the Groom to be is responsible for picking the best man and of course picking wisely. They may want someone who can organise a mean stag party but they also need someone who can ease their nerves on the day, deliver a decent speech and help to organise friends and family on the day. So their task here is fairly simple, avoid the first choice that enters their head unless this person can fulfil not just one but all of these roles!

The groom is responsible for organising his suit and sometimes the suits for the other men of the wedding party. In many cases however, the bride will choose to take control of this aspect of the planning herself, especially as she will usually be looking to colour match the cravats with the bridesmaid dresses and it is a known fact that colour blindness is more common in men!

The Groom's speech is one of the more obvious responsibilities. The speech comes after the Father of the Bride’s but before the Best Man. The Groom must be sure to mention that the bride looks wonderful and how lucky he is to have found her, thank the wedding guests, the best man, the bridesmaids and anyone else he can think of and distribute the gifts not forgetting to once again mention just how wonderful his new wife is!

So there you have it, when it comes to it there isn’t really a great deal for the Groom to be to think about, unless he wants to that is. Over recent years however, we have heard from some of you that your Groom has been keen to become a lot more involved and we don’t just mean helping out with tasting food and wine. We know of examples where right down to the final details such as choosing fabrics and flowers, your Groom has had his say. Heck we even know of one case where a Hubby to be visited the florist and drew various versions of how in his view the flowers should look!

If your Groom has volunteered to help but doesn’t really know where to start, there are many ways to hep him out. Buy him a Groom’s guide from your local Waterstones, drag him along to a few wedding fayres and delegate a few of the tasks to him. As a good money saving tip, why not even split the wedding budget and challenge each other as to who can find the best deals and save the bigger portion of their budget!

Of course, you may prefer to manage the entire planning yourself. If this is the case and your Hubby to be won’t take no for an answer then try and get him searching for the most impossible of items to find or researching online while you go ahead and organise everything else. Failing this try overdosing him on wedding fayres until he will never want to see another venue or wedding brochure again! After all girls, it’s your day so you must decide, do you want their help or not?

Post your comments on the Mrs2Be blog and let us know just how involved your Hubby to be will get!

Happy Planning

Why Old, New, Borrowed and Blue?

When it comes to weddings whether traditional or not, most of us are suspicious enough to adhere to the well known saying 'somethings old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. It is a less known fact that this rhyme also goes on to say 'and a silver sixpence in your shoe'! This rhyme dates back to Victorian times and each line has a meaning as follows:



Something old - The reason for something old is that by incorporating something old, the bride is said to be representing a link with her family and her old life. There are many ways in which to incorporate something old, the most popular being an item of jewelery but sometimes even a wedding dress that was worn previously by a member of the bride's family!



Something new - By wearing something new, it is said that the bride will enjoy good fortune and success in her new life. This is probably the easiest tradition to follow as more often than not, the bride has a new dress (and new underwear of course!) for her wedding day.



Something borrowed - The tradition of having something borrowed actually requires the bride to choose something that has already been worn by a happy bride at her wedding. Jewelery is popular again as well as items such as handkerchiefs or hair decoration.



Something blue - This tradition dates back to biblical days when blue was considered to represent purity and fidelity. Often the bride will wear a garter trimmed in blue or a hidden blue band around her leg.



So why the silver sixpence? A silver sixpence placed into a brides left shoes is said to bring a bride wealth, joy and happiness throughout her married life.



Happy hunting for those all important items!

Large Rise in Prenuptial Agreements

The solicitors group, Resolution, is reporting a tenfold increase in the number of prenuptial agreements being drawn up in the UK. However, prenuptial agreements are currently only enforceable in Scotland but not in England and Wales though the courts will take them into account when deciding on divorce settlements.

However, this may all change soon as the Law Commission has said that they will be consulting on their use in England and Wales and The Conservative party have made it known that they would like them to become legally binding as the are in many other countries in Europe.

With the 45% of marriages now ending in divorce, is a prenuptial agreement on your agenda?

Who Pays?!

Believe it or not, a simple civil wedding ceremony can cost less than fifty pounds, yet the average cost of a wedding in the UK today is said to be between fifteen and twenty thousand pounds! So who is expected to pay for what? Well, there is no magic formula but things have certainly moved on since the days when a Bride's family were expected to foot the majority of the bill.


Mrs2Be has conducted fairly extensive research into this over recent years and we have found that despite wedding etiquette proclaiming that it is the responsibility of the Bride's Father to foot the majority of the bill, it really does fluctuate quite dramatically from couple to couple. These days, it is more common for both sets of parents to chip in and for the Bride and Groom themselves to contribute. In fact we have found that in a lot of cases, the Bride and Groom actually pay for a bigger chunk of the wedding than anyone and in some cases prefer to foot the entire bill themselves!


If this doesn't appeal to you then decide how to approach this with your parents. If they are aware of this shift in balance you probably already know about it and you might even have been lucky enough for them to bring the subject up and offer a sum of money already. If not however, the advice that we and the Brides in our research give is simply to approach the subject sooner rather than later. This also avoids uneasy conversations later down the line, especially if you have gone ahead and incorrectly assumed one way or the other.


Getting a clear idea of who will pay for what upfront should help you to avoid finding yourself unable to pay for something that you booked in the hope that one set of parents or other would one day hand you some cash! Who knows, you may even find when you ask that you are better off than you thought. One word of warning however, we do know of one bride whose parents offered to foot the bill, however she chose not to divulge this to her Hubby to be and chose instead to allow both him and his parents to plough money in to the pot and to SPEND the cash that she was given from her parents on a few too shopping sprees!!!!. Needless to say, this ended in complete disaster and so it should have!


Happy Planning! x

Anniversary Gifts

As a nice distraction from wedding planning, we thought you might appreciate a handy list of the traditional wedding anniversary gifts and the modern alternatives that you will have to look forward to for years to come. It might be that you print this list and sellotape it to the inside wardrobe door of your hubby to be, or it might be that you simply want to use it to warn him that your gift expectations do not fall in line with tradition!



We at the Mrs2Be office have decided that we prefer the modern gift alternatives and definitely prefer years 15 onwards We do wonder though if it is about time that someone reversed the traditional order of things and brought the platinum year forward!






Traditional/Modern


Year 1 Paper/Clocks

Year 2 Cotton/China

Year 3 Leather /Crystal

Year 4 Fruit/Flowers Appliances

Year 5 Wood /Silver wear

Year 6 Iron/ Wood

Year 7 Wool or Copper /Desk Sets

Year 8 Bronze Linen/Lace

Year 9 Willow or pottery /Leather

Year 10 Tin or aluminium/ Jewellery

Year 11 Steel /Fashion Jewellery

Year 12 Silk or linen/ Pearls or Gems

Year 13 Lace /Textiles

Year 14 Ivory/ Gold

Year 15 Crystal /Watches

Year 20 China /Platinum

Year 25 Silver /Silver

Year 30 Pearl/ Diamond

Year 35 Coral /Jade

Year 40 Ruby /Ruby

Year 45 Sapphire /Sapphire

Year 50 Gold/ Gold

Year 55 Emerald /Emerald

Year 60 Diamond /Diamond


Happy Planning Ahead!

Perfect Planning

With wedding planning season now in full swing, we wanted to remind you to check out your local wedding fairs. Do as much research as possible before booking a supplier, remember to compare quality, cost and most importantly make sure that you click with the supplier that you are thinking of booking.

Over the next few months, venues across the country will be host to some fabulous wedding fairs and we don't just mean the biggies. Keep your eyes peeled in the local press and outside hotels for details of forth coning fairs. Remember that organisers also generally list the fairs with on the Internet, so keep an eye on the Mrs2Be Bridal Fairs tab on our left hand menu!

If you find that there are two fairs clashing on a certain day and you can't make both, try and find out which seems to be most worth attending. If you are more interested in some items more than others, it's worth knowing that some will have fashion shows, hair and make up demonstrations and even samples of the entertainment and food, where as others will simply have a number of stands where exhibitors will show samples of their work.

This information should be readily available on the fair organisers website or even included in their adverts and is crucial research to make sure that you get the most out of your trip, especially if you have dragged hubby to be along as well. If you need to do some gentle persuading to get him to come along, then pick a fair that will have something of interest to him. As well as the run of the mill menswear stands, some fairs now feature specific stands for the groom such as stag night or men's grooming.



Happy Planning!

Mrs2Be Competes to Save Money!

We are excited to say that we have had some recent engagement news in the office! With our Mrs2Be bride gathering her wedding quotes already, we couldn’t resist a bit of competition in the office and have been out and about this week to see just how much we could save her on a number of wedding ‘essentials’.

You will be pleased to hear that in total, we managed to save over two thousand pound on her initial quotes and we didn’t even mention Mrs2Be once! So where did our savings come from…..?

Firstly venue decoration, our bride’s best quote for the seat covers that she wanted was £3.95. We had quotes ranging from £2.50 to £4.50 so we checked them out and found that in our view the particular style of cover on offer at £2.50 was a bit cheap looking. We preferred the poly cotton version which we were quoted £3.90 per cover for from one supplier but managed to find the same quality cover at just £3.25 from another. This is the type that our bride was looking for so based on 100 guests (our office bride to be is having rather a large bash!) we bagged a saving of £65 here. We also managed to get matching favors and place cards from the same supplier again making a saving from an initial price quoted of £1.50 per favour to just £1.20 and from £1.10 per place card to just £90p! A total saving of £115 on our venue decoration for a start!

When it came to the photographs, even we admit that this was a bit more complicated to decipher. There are so many packages on offer that it can be hard to compare so we chose a CD only option as this is what our bride was looking for. She had been quoted £650 which seemed to be the average price. The quotes that we got ranged from £300 to £750 and we eventually settled for a package in the middle at £550 managing to also negotiate to just £500, a saving of £150 on the average price. We tried to compare like for like and thought it was important to mention that the quality of the photographers seemed to range hugely. We found that some of the cheaper CD options didn’t seem to have the image range and the photographers themselves didn’t seem to have worked on as many weddings, however there were a few exceptions.

At the more expensive end of the market, the photographers seemed to have a larger portfolio and had been in the industry a lot longer. Our advice here is that unless the photographer comes highly recommended to research, research, research. There’s nothing to say that a photographer charging £300 is any less qualified than one charging £500, but do your research and ensure that you are comfortable with the choice that you make. Don’t skimp on quality for the sake of a cost saving as this is one of the most important items and one that will be with you forever!

When we looked into transport, we had to compare like for like again. We found that the average cost of a car was now at around £350 and a horse and carriage around £650. We based our needs on our bride who will be having a horse and carriage for herself as well as a car for her bridesmaids. We shopped around and played a few companies off against each other coming out with a saving of £50 on the car and £60 on the horse and carriage, a combined saving of £110.

Our bride had chosen a specific gown so we called around to obtain a price, we were able to save £40 by shopping around and found many two for one deals offering the grooms suit for free when the gown was purchased from a particular store. Realistically you may not want to travel far for your gown, however check prices at local bridal houses and keep your eyes peeled for the two for one offers. We also found savings of between £15 and £25 per bridesmaid dress at certain bridal houses when two or more dresses were ordered. With our bride having 4 bridesmaids, we managed to save £100 on the bridesmaid dresses as well as the £40 on the bridal gown, giving us a total saving of £140.

Conscious that she had quite a large number of guests for the wedding breakfast our bride was concerned about the quote that she had received at £50 per head. We spoke to a number of local venues and found that if she didn’t mind a buffet style meal rather than a 3 course formal affair, she could save on average £15 per head. This was music to her ears, as this would allow her to splash out on her honeymoon shopping trip. This gives her a saving of £1500 and is where in this case the biggest proportion of the saving is to be made.

As with all employees of the Mrs2Be office, our bride loves chocolate, so insisted on a chocolate fountain. Having initially been quoted £350 for a 150 person fountain; we found a like for like offer for just £275! This time we didn’t switch supplier as we wanted to stick to a local supplier (to be able to go out and sample the chocolate again of course!) but we did manage to knock the original supplier down to the same price giving us a saving of £75.00.

Initially our bride wanted lots of flowers in her table centrepieces, until she was given a cost of £25 per centrepiece that is! With eleven tables she agreed to compromise with some simple displays with just 3-4 flowers in each. In our view this added elegance and style and cost just £15 per centrepiece saving another £110 here. We also saved on the flowers for the top table by having these transferred from the arrangements at the church, another £40 saving here, giving us a saving total of £150 on the flowers!

We found that the best quote we had for a DJ was £180 and this was the same price that our bride to be had been quoted. We felt that for 5 hours, this was reasonable and were wary of cheaper quotes that we were given as they didn’t seem to be of the same quality so in this instance we stuck to the original quote.

As our bride wanted a toastmaster, she had been told by her preferred venue that she had to have the hotel recommended toastmaster at a cost of £200. This is where it gets interesting as we recently reported on this very issue of hotels demanding that their own suppliers are used for certain items! We found a great local toastmaster at a cost of £150 so now it’s up to our bride to decide for definite on her venue as her other options had no preference. If she does go for this venue then we are sure we will be able to twist their arm and bag another saving of £50!

And for now, our fun comes to an end, although with the bash that our bride is going for, we are sure that in time there will be many more occasions where we can stick our nose for a bargain in! For now our message is simply that there are clearly many ways to save money on your big day but the main thing is to ensure that the quality of goods is not compromised when doing so. Set a wedding budget and have fun seeing just how much you can save on one thing then either save this or splash out on another more expensive item or something you didn’t think you would be able to afford – like the shopping trip!

Happy Planning x

Katie Price To Wed Again

The news that has us all talking in the Mrs2Be office today is recent claims in the press that Katie Price is to marry again this Christmas following her quickie divorce from Peter Andre earlier this week. Katie apparently celebrated her divorce by drinking pink champagne with her Mum and inviting her celebrity friends to a divorce party.

Now apparently due to marry cage fighter Alex Reid this December, Katie was recently spotted with what looked like yet another huge rock on her finger. Add to this the fact that she is also apparently talking of having another child and it really does seem as if Katie has moved on.

When she married Peter in that fantastic pink dress four years ago, Mrs2Be was amazed at the number of Katie and Peter style weddings that sprang up, so we can't wait to see what she comes up with this time!

Keep your eyes peeled for a new trend this December ladies..........

A Warm Mrs2Be Welcome to Pear Tree Pictures

Mrs2Be welcomes Pear Tree Pictures! Pear Tree Pictures are wedding photographers who work throughout the UK but predominantly throughout London, Kent, Essex, Hertfordshire, Surrey, Hampshire, Buckinghamshire and the South-East.

Their reportage style photography is simply beautiful - why not see some of our Pear Tree Pictures Real Life Brides and judge for yourselves!

Cake!

At auction today is none other than a slice of Prince Charles and Camilla's wedding cake!

Following the sale of a piece of cake from Charles and Diana's wedding which went for £1,000 at auction last year, we will be interested to see how much today's piece makes!

The cake will go on sale today at Hampshire auctions in Andover. It is estimated that it will sell for a lot less at around £60 - £80, the cake is ironically being sold by a lady by the name of Diana.

Watch this space for the result of the auction!

Uma Thurman To Wed At Kensington Palace!

Uma Thurman has apparently rented Kensington Palace for her wedding to Arpad Busson next year. It is expected that the wedding will take place in June with Uma planning a fairytale affair. Already well on her way to feeling like a princess with her eight carat diamond ring, all Uma needs now is the palace!

It costs around £11,000 to hire the room for the ceremony and the venue however Uma has apparently also hired the rest of the palace to ensure her privacy. It is expected that close friends Sir Elton John, Claudier Schiffer and Sting will all attend the ceremony.

We will be keeping our eyes peeled for news of her wedding plans!

09-09-09

It is the ninth day of the ninth month of the year 2009 and don't we know it in the wedding industry! After the fever surrounding the seventh of the seventh two thousand and seven weddings, once again wedding venues across the globe have been inundated with requests for couples to marry on this date. Las Vegas has once again been at the centre of wedding chaos as couples queue to wed with many being turned down due to numbers.

Couples across the world have not only picked today's actual date for all the nines but have really gone to town and are also fighting for 9am and 9pm slots at nine minutes past the hour, with 9 or 99 guests and in some cases with almost everything they can think of being related back in some way to the number 9!

So why such craziness over these quirky dates? Couples quite simply love the symbolism and the symmetry of these dates and the fact that the next time the date will come along will be in another century. Some feel that the date spells good luck, while others are purposely avoiding the date saying that it is too closely related to 666. Some even say that they picked this date simply because it will be easier to remember future anniversaries! Whatever the reason, there are simply tens of thousands of couples opting for today's date ...... ah how romantic!

Who Recommended Your Suppliers?

We know here at Mrs2Be just what a minefield it can be when choosing suppliers for your very special day. Often when a couple visit their wedding venue, their venue will provide them with recommended suppliers, but are your venue always best placed to recommend a supplier to you?

There are certainly advantages to working with suppliers who know your wedding venue and how the work, but many suppliers are used to working with different venues.

Our concern is that there are occasions when a Wedding Venue has a vested interest for you to use their recommended suppliers as it has come to our attention here in the Mrs2Be office, that some unscrupulous members of staff are taking - hmmm - let's say "a monetary gift" from certain suppliers in order to ensure they are the supplier that is recommended.

We are not happy about this at all and we are pretty sure our lovely couples would not be either! Let's face it, this is them recommending the best person for them - not the best person for YOU! This is YOUR day, and you deserve the best YOUR money can buy!

So here are our top tips:

1. By all means, listen to what your venue has to say with regard to suppliers.
2. Speak to friends and relatives who have got married recently, think about weddings you have been to where you particularly admired something such as flowers, table decorations etc.
3. Visit local bridal fayres and collect some information from them too.
4. Make a shortlist of say 3 x suppliers and make appointments to go and visit them.
5. Pick someone you can work with, someone who gets back to you in a timely fashion and does what they say they are going to do, and of course, someone whose work you have seen for yourself and you admire.

There are many wedding venues who will happily recommend suppliers and have absolutely no vested interest at all, but the safe bet would be for you to add them to your shortlist and follow the same tip tips above - just to be sure they are the right supplier for YOU and not for your venue!

Football's Mr Nice Gary Lineker has wed!

Football's 'Mr Nice' - Gary Lineker has wed his beautiful girlfriend of 2 years, Danielle Bux, in a very private ceremony in Italy.

The service is reported to have cost them just £400 and took place in Ravello Town Hall with just two witnesses present. The Groom wore an outfit without a tie and the bride wore a simple cream dress.

The couple then celebrated with family and friends in true celebrity style, throwing a party reported to have cost in the region of £250,000 at the Hotel Caruso!

On this occasion the Groom was fully suited and booted! And the bride wore a beautiful wedding gown by Suzanne Neville which we think is from the 2009/2010 Royal Collection!

More details and photos can be found here.

The team at Mrs2Be wish them all the very best for the future.